I have six photos in my hand...

I may be a newbie to the cult of America's Next Top Model, but I am totally addicted to the drama of this show. The tension that builds when the models receive TyraMail. The concentration and drive it takes to fall from a platform and still look pretty. The sheer triumph of the spirit to SWIRL!

This show is so campy, it makes actual camp look like Greek tragedy.

But the show reached its beautiful apex last night when Jade (the biatch of the show) took one look at her crying picture, and started to cry about how much pain she kept inside, how much struggle she went through... and then Tyra called her out for being fake! Fabulous!

I'm surprised that time didn't end because of the massive mind-bending paradox that unfolded. Tyra Banks (who is faker than a Presbyterian woman's orgasm) called another bitch out for being fake? Oh, the irony! Oh, the drama! Oh, the serious whispering!

And they still found time to fix Joanie's snaggletooth.

What a show.